Tuesday, August 09, 2005

WCBE 90.5 FM: "Four Brothers," "Last Days"

WCBE#230-FINAL
It's Movie Time
Co-hosts, writers & producers: John DeSando & Clay Lowe
For WCBE 90.5 FM

Reviews: “Four Brothers,” “Last Days”
Taped: 1:30 pm, August 10, 2005
Air Time: 3:01 pm and 8:01 pm, August 12, 2005
Streaming live on the web at http://www.wcbe.org .

The Script:

John

"Four Brothers" is a Detroit homecoming with attitude . . .

Clay

“Last Days” is an excruciating look at a drugged up, dropped out musician . . .

MUSIC UP THEN UNDER FOR:

Richelle Antczak

"It's Movie Time" in Central-Ohio with John DeSando and Clay Lowe . . .

MUSIC BRIEFLY UP THEN SLOWLY DOWN AND OUT

John

I'm John DeSando

Clay

And I'm Clay Lowe

John (“Four Brothers”)

Clay--John Singleton, a black director with a pedigree boasting Boyz n Hood, has a family film called Four Brother that unlike the similarly themed but relatively benign The Sons of Katie Elder glorifies vengeance in the name of family ties. The Step-Mom of 3 young black men and a white boy (Mark Wahlberg) is murdered by contract killers. After laborious back story material and the usual bonding business, the boys go out on a violent spree, the most brutal of the summer.

Singleton captures the apparent code of the Detroit streets that in the name of mother the ends justify the means, in this case besting the cops by getting better clues and swifter justice. The film is slow in parts, especially the set up, but Wahlberg is as good as any of the black actors like Terrence Dashon Howard, who would seem to be better suited to playing urban vigilantes than this former underwear salesman.

Clay ("Four Brothers")

I have no idea what you're talking about, John, but Wahlberg is as true to form in "Four Brothers" as he was in "I Heart Huckabees" [when he played a wise cracking, face smacking cut-up of a clown]. The difference is that, this time, he gets to cry, and cry, and cry. But come on, John, at least give Wahlberg's adopted movie brothers some credit for holding their own on the screen with him.

The problem is, however, as gritty as the movie’s set-up is, and as nasty as the final shoot-out sequences are; the movie fails for me because director Singleton is just too much of a nice guy. "Bang, bang, you're dead," he said, but what he needed to do was to show the brothers ripping off the faces of the bad guys. You know, the way that Quentin Tarantino did in "Kill Bill," and the way Spike Lee did in "Summer of Sam."

Credit Singleton for continuing to focus his camera on the forgotten violence of back street America, but fault Singleton for choosing to set a tone that’s too Mo-Town and not enough gangsta.

John (“Last Days”)

Clay, I doubt if on the day in 1994 when Nirvana front man, Kurt Cobain, ended his life with a shotgun to the head, anyone saw his soul rise toward heaven, as Gus Van Sant depicts in Last Days, his interpretation of cultural phenomena that he also explored in Elephant, the film about Columbine-like assassins.

It is not always fun to sit through the numerous long takes of “rock and roll cliché” Blake (Michael Blake) doing almost nothing but making macaroni and cheese. Yet if Van Sant wants us to know why life is not worth living for this lost soul, then he succeeds by showing how isolated and mundane Blake’s life actually was at the end.

These last days will be MY last days watching another pop cult music icon fall into a non-returnable funk.

Clay (“Last Days”)

Blake’s life was mundane at the end, John, because despite his success and despite his hard “rock ‘n roll” fame, his life turned out to be more about rhythm and blues than the glories of being an American Idol.

By fixating his camera on actor Michael Pitt aimlessly wandering through woodland waterfalls and streams, director Van Sant has returned us, once more, to those primeval wonders of nature that so haunted his wandering characters in “Jerry.” Those natural sounds, that solitude, the growing awareness of a living world that’s bigger than self. That’s the place where Van Sant always returns us.

Like, Ricky, the confused young videographer in “American Beauty,” Van Sant is content to patiently track blowing leaves and discarded scraps of paper.

But enough of revenge, violence, and solace, John, because it’s grading time.

John

Holy Heroin Hooray!

"Four Brothers” earns a "C" because KILLING CONTRACT KILLERS should never be a family affair. . .

Clay

"Four Brothers” gets a “B” because BABY BOY Tyrese is still a need’n his ever-lovin’ mama . . .

John

"Last Days” earns a "B" because BAND BOYS would be BETTER as BUS BOYS . . .

Clay

"Last Days” gets a “B” because Van Sant’s BLAKE sings songs of pain, not innocence . . .

John

Clay--I'm going to my Russian interpreter's home to make macaroni and cheese and sing indecipherable pop songs. I should get lucky with that act.

I'm outta here!

Clay

Just don’t sing with mouth full, John, I hate it when you dribble thick cheese down your chin.

I'm outta here. too

See you at the movies, folks.

HIT MUSIC

Richelle:

The Award Winning "It's Movie Time" with John DeSando and Clay Lowe is written and produced by John DeSando and Clay Lowe in conjunction with 90.5 FM, WCBE in Columbus and 106.7 FM in Newark.

MUSIC UP AND OUT

© 2005 John DeSando and Clay Lowe

Saturday, August 06, 2005

WCBE 90.5 FM: "Murderball," "Dukes of Hazzard"

WCBE#229-FINAL
It's Movie Time
Co-hosts, writers & producers: John DeSando & Clay Lowe
For WCBE 90.5 FM

Reviews: “Murderball,” "Dukes of Hazzard"
Taped: 2:00 pm, August 3, 2005
Air Time: 3:01 pm and 8:01 pm, August 5, 2005
Streaming live on the web at http://www.wcbe.org .

The Script:

John
"Murderball" is a killer doc . . .

Clay
“Dukes of Hazzard” will have you putting your funny bone on orange alert . . .

MUSIC UP THEN UNDER FOR:

Richelle Antczak
"It's Movie Time" in Central-Ohio with John DeSando and Clay Lowe . . .

MUSIC BRIEFLY UP THEN SLOWLY DOWN AND OUT

John
I'm John DeSando

Clay
And I'm Clay Lowe

John (“Murderball”)
Clay, I doubt anyone seeing the documentary Murderball will ever again offer assistance to a paraplegic, much less these quadriplegic Rugby players. They compete in Paralympics like gladiators itching for a fight,they want no sympathy, they need no help, and they are better human beings than they might have been without their disabilities.

Sympathy has no seat in watching the preparations from 2002 and 2004 for the battle between the US and Canada. Who wins seems like an afterthought to their being winners before the games.

And if you thought these guys might be left out of the lovemaking game, think again: They and their chariots are chick magnets, for whom their personalities and determination are aphrodisiac enough.

Murderball is not about Rugby, of which there is too little in the film; it is about human beings doing fate in by doing all they can with what they're given. This is the ultimate reality show. Everyone should see it.

Clay ("Murderball")
Chick magnets, John, boy were you caught up in the spirit of the XY chromosome male. I’ll bet you were even hoping that Bush would send John “Damaged goods” Bolton to be our butt kicking rep at the UN.

But come on, folks, even though “Murderball” IS an engrossing film about real life quadriplegics who have learning to channel their anger through competition, aggression is not the only way to deal with the misfortunes that life sometimes visits upon us. Case in point, the more giving and forgiving life-style choices made by the late Christopher Reeve.

Nevertheless, Murderball, is a tightly edited, fast paced, and brutally honest documentary that will have you sitting on the edge of your seats in amazement as the movie’s so-called handicapped men demonstrate on camera, that it takes more than physical damage to keep a good man down.

John (“Dukes of Hazzard”)
The Dukes of Hazzard is a witless romp in a Dodge Charger named General Lee outwitting an inept but good ol'boy sheriff and his boss, Boss Hogg, played by a miscast Burt Reynolds.

But the movie is fun if you let it be all it is, which is not much. This updated version of the late '70's TV show is an audience pleaser, not just for Jessica Simpson's skimpy outfits, but also for the inane antics that the hotrodding, irresponsible hillbillies do repetitiously. The redeeming social value of the film, besides highlighting the eternal stereotyping of Southerners, is the ill will toward a coal mining industry that threatens to strip mine the entire town, actually not a bad idea if the movie went that way as well.

The General Lee is a durable car; the TV show and the film may have that same longevity for an undemanding audience that might not know its pigs from its pokes.

Clay (“Dukes of Hazzard”)
Folks, if you don’t know a pig from a poke, then you probably also don’t know that there’s more to Georgia than that I-95 six hour drive from the mountains of Tennessee to the beaches of Florida. But if you’re flying high in a ‘69 Charger with Jessica Simpson blasting Sweet Kisses out of your quads, what matters?

And if the new “Dukes of Hazzard” is as full of stereotypes as a poke full of buzzards, then as long as they keep you laughing, who cares?

And if your dying to know if Jessica Simpson is cuter and sexier than Brittany Spears, then you really need a life the movies won’t give you.

All in all, sometimes you’ll laugh at the movie’s red-necked humor, sometimes you won’t. Sometimes Jessica babe is sexy, sometimes she’s not. And sometimes the Dukes of Hazzard will have your sides splitting in laughter but never so much as when you the out-takes roll at the end of the movie’s credits.

But enough of armored wheelchairs, supercharged males, and lip glossed southern belles, John, because it’s grading time.

John
Hooray!

"Dukes of Hazzard" earns a C because I can SEE what the audience likes but I don't have to like it. . .

Clay
"Dukes of Hazzard" gets a D because the longer it goes the dumber it gets . . .

John
"Murderball” earns an A for AUTHENTIC athletics . . .

Clay
"Murderball” gets a B because Big Bad Boys don’t always deliver. . .

John
Clay--You spent time in Georgia. Are the women really as stupid and sexy as Jessica Simpson?

Clay
Sexy yes, stupid no - because, even today, there isn’t an Alpha male in Athens that a sweet little ole southern belle can’t bring to heel in a pine woods or a pasture . . .

I'm outta here

See you at the movies, folks.

HIT MUSIC

Richelle:

The Award Winning "It's Movie Time" with John DeSando and Clay Lowe is written and produced by John DeSando and Clay Lowe in conjunction with 90.5 FM, WCBE in Columbus and 106.7 FM in Newark.

MUSIC UP AND OUT

© 2005 John DeSando and Clay Lowe

Monday, August 01, 2005

WCBE 90.5 FM "Must Love Dogs," "Happy Endings," "Apres Vous"

WCBE#228-FINAL
It's Movie Time
Co-hosts, writers & producers: John DeSando & Clay Lowe
For WCBE 90.5 FM

Reviews: “Must Love Dogs,” “Happy Endings,” ”Apres Vous”
Taped: 2:00 pm, July 27, 2005
Air Time: 3:01 pm and 8:01 pm, July 29, 2005
Streaming live on the web at http://www.wcbe.org .

The Script:

Clay
“Must Love Dogs” is a fluffy romancer from the creator of Spin City and Family Ties . . .

John
"Happy Endings" has some loose ends. . .

Clay
"Apres Vous” is about two Frenchmen and the woman who’s the object of their love . . .

MUSIC UP THEN UNDER FOR:

Richelle Antczak
"It's Movie Time" in Central-Ohio with John DeSando and Clay Lowe . . .

MUSIC BRIEFLY UP THEN SLOWLY DOWN AND OUT

John
I'm John DeSando

Clay
And I'm Clay Lowe

John (“Must Love Dogs”)
Clay, What does a filmmaker do to enrich a clichéd story about a beautiful middle-aged woman who has turned to internet dating to find a man? Well, in Must Love Dogs, Gary David Goldberg simply writes some witty lines about contemporary sexual politics and directs an able cast headed by John Cusack and Diane Lane as the aging sweetheart wannabees.

The film is a veritable dictionary of stereotypes and genre staples: For example, the colorful family, the handsome womanizer, the gay best friend, meeting cute and doing cute (Although speeding around town looking for condoms is both cute and original). But there is a freshness I haven't seen since the older couple, Jack Nicholson and Diane Keaton, danced around in Something's Gotta Give 2 years ago.

The director is a TV person, so I need to allow him time to expunge glossy game-show lighting and sitcom set ups. Yet, Must Love Dogs is light and airy for the dog days of summer.

Clay (“Must Love Dogs”)
Folks, you DO have to watch out for old TV persons, but GARY David Goldberg, who once wrote for both Mash and Lou Grant, proves he still hasn’t lost that mass audience touch. Sure. Must Love Dogs is chock full of stock characters and predictable situations. But like TV’s Mash and Lou Grant, Must Love Dogs is PEOPLED with an extremely talented cast.

Dianne Lane, from Under the Tuscan Sun and Walk on the Moon, plays the role of an abandoned lover with her usual radiant charm. And John Cusack, her equally forsaken paramour, rises to the occasion on the wings of his romanticism and wit. Best of all, you’ll never see Dr. Zhivago again in quite the same light.

Light weight stuff, John, to be sure. But after a summer zombies, superheros, and invasions from Mars, Must Love Dogs is a welcome relief from the heat.

But, for further relief, how about a preview of the soon to arrive Happy Endings?

John (“Happy Endings”)
Clay--The film Happy Endings fulfills its titular promise and therein lies my criticism: This sometimes wise, other times didactic amalgam of 10 stories, essentially preaches honesty to oneself and to others.

Director Dan Roos (writer of Bounce) blends stories as different as an abortion-clinic woman being blackmailed about the daughter she gave up for adoption and a story about best friends-- gay and lesbian couples-- all in common with happy endings that stretch believability.

When a character claims she is not pro-life, a male avers, "Who is, once you start paying attention?" Well, pay attention because this is a challenging film with an excellent performance by Steve Coogan as a recently turned gay man in a nowhere situation. About him someone says, "Charley is gay now. Who isn't?"

The songs that bookend the film, Honesty and I love you just the way you are, are emblematic of the film's sunny and unrealistic attitude.

Clay ("Apres Vous")
Folks, the new French film in town, “Apres Vous” has taken over two years to get here and there just might be a reason why. Finding an audience for a film about two middle-aged, weak-willed French men, just might not be the easiest thing to do. Even though one of those men is played by our favorite French actor, John, Daniel Auteuil. (Oh toy) from Girl on the Bridge.

The setting certainly should attract our fans from Splendid Table: the Chez Jean in Paris is replete with white table cloths and a resident wine steward, who has been expertly taught how to sell the restaurant’s most expensive bouquets.

But Auteuil’s (Oh toys) role as a waiter, who doesn’t know when to stop giving, and his overly dependent protégé, who keeps asking for more, will soon be boring you with their incessant inability's to ease off.

Not even their provocative dual relationship with the angular flower girl Blanche is going to save what should have been a Gaelic charmer.

But enough of wine, canines, and happy endings, John, because it’s grading time.

John
Hooray!

"Must Love Dogs" earns a "B" because even though the romantic comedy genre is a dog, you must love this film . . .

Clay
"Must Love Dogs" gets an “A” because my AFFECTION for the movie’s fine ACTING overcomes my AVERSION to fluff . . .

John
"Happy Endings" earns a "B" for its happy meal attitude and split ends structure . . .

Clay
"Apres Vous" gets a tepid “C” because the food and wine, though good, ARE far too intense for my palette . . .

John
Clay, now I know how you connect with so many young women! You're using the internet! I never had to! I'm outta here.

Clay
John, I prefer social intercourse as a way to meet new people and that’s why I hang out at MACS CAFE, where everyone, for better or worse, knows my name.

I'm outta here. too

See you at the movies, folks.

HIT MUSIC

Richelle:
The Award Winning "It's Movie Time" with John DeSando and Clay Lowe is written and produced by John DeSando and Clay Lowe in conjunction with 90.5 FM, WCBE in Columbus and 106.7 FM in Newark.

MUSIC UP AND OUT

© 2005 John DeSando and Clay Lowe